When Boy Dates Girl!!

I got asked about the subject of relationships and so this is my response.  My rule of thumb is that if you can help it, hold off on starting a relationship.  High school already brings a ton of pressure and the last thing you need is a relationship that is complicated by nature.  I also understand those who feel the need to have one.  For those who are thinking about going in that direction here are a few things I would love for you to think about.  This is my relationship checklist and insight.

  1. Christ must be first in both lives. – 2 Corinthians 6:14 It’s easier to keep your standards and boundaries when your moral compasses are the same.
  2. Your relationships should be making you a better person and even strengthening  your walk with Christ.  The people in your life should be adding to it and not negatively taking away from it. – Proverbs 27:17
  3. Set standards that reflect how God sees and loves you. Write them down so you don’t forget them.  God sees you as worth dying for!  Don’t insult what he did by letting someone treat you with nothing less than the respect you deserve.
  4. Set boundaries and talk honestly, openly and frequently about them. Those who fail to set boundaries fail to understand that the consequences of their actions can be life changing for the worse. SET BOUNDARIES!!!
  5. Have an accountability partner that you can be truthful with and give them the authority to speak into your life. You need someone who’s going to tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. – Ecclesiastes 4:10
  6. Don’t be afraid to end a relationship that is not honoring God.  If you are in a relationship (whether it’s with friends or boyfriend/girlfriend) and it’s dragging you down or you are starting to make bad choices, seek counsel and don’t be afraid to end the relationship.
  7. Let your parents weigh in on your decision. #superunpopularbutyouwon’tregretit:)

Being in the wrong type of relationship can do a lot of damage to you as an individual.  The bible says in 1 Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.”  You must understand that  relationships are time consuming and if it is not doing what #2 says you are automatically spending a lot of time doing just the opposite.  While relationships can produce good things they also can produce very bad things which can carry over from relationship to relationship.

I believe we deceive ourselves most in the area of relationships.  We can be so blinded by our feelings that we allow them to make decisions for us.  I do not deny that feelings make it hard for us to just do what we logically know is right.  That’s why #5 is so important.  You need people in your life that can be honest with you when you are not being honest with yourself.  Someone who knows you and can speak logic and common sense into your situation.

You also have to be honest with yourself and listen to those who are in your life that only have your best interest at heart.  There is nothing worse than someone choosing to stay in a place that will automatically cause more harm than good.  That is why we live in community with others because we need people to speak truth to us when we are blinded and self-deceived.

Three questions for you to ask yourself:

  • Am I in a relationship blinded by my feelings?
  • Are there steps in this post I haven’t done or applied?
  • What part of this post can I relate to the most?

Hope it Helps!  Re-post.

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